The A-Team: Party Like It’s 1983

★★

Jessica Lohse

Of the many rehashed 80’s films making a comeback this latter part of the decade, The (much-vaunted) A-Team is resuscitated; but is it the Second Coming or an unholy, shambling thing due for a double-tap?

Filmmaker Joe Carnahan of epic Oscar-winning fame for such titles as -nothing, attempts to hook younger audiences into the cult series.

The A-Team merch van rolls into Forbidden Planet hopefully plugging the $100 million hole it left in its wake. It begs the question: ‘How much of that money went to paying Liam Neeson to say “I love it when a plan comes together” 10 times?’ The DVD set of the old skool A-Team was a hit seller; but does that provide enough justification to make a film dominated by absurdly annoying Bradley Cooper? For some inexplicable reason he gets to skulk in for far more screen time than he deserves in the role where he doesn’t quite hit the mark as everyone’s favourite lovable rogue? Let’s Face it, they could do better. Of course, since the rumormill began running the Chinese Whispers game of an A-Team film, people have begun mentally building their own brand of dream cast to compare to the actual selections in the film itself. I have no idea who these actors are, but I think it’s safe to say Joe Carnahan might consider using a fan of the series for Casting Director if he ever gets the opportunity to excrete a sequel. In that regard, we can only hope there is no plan B.

This reminds one of the time X-Men 3: The Last Stand nearly won director Gavin Hood the honorific of being the man responsible for turning Hollywood into the next Lynchburg for the scores of angry fans clamouring for blood. This leads to my parting thoughts on The A-Team: You can’t please the all fans, but you can at least try to make an entertaining (and hopefully average) film.